||[Aug. 8th, 2005|09:28 pm]
I logged in thinking I was going to give an actual update but this briefing will have to do.
Finished up my first week of assistant managering at Century Center 'Bux. I like it so far. I'm still not use to working so much...my tiredness is reminscent of when I was working the 'bux and mci and I haven't quite adjusted. At least when I was working the 2 jobs I had Victor to come home to at night, but now I come home tired to a usually hot room, and a restless nights sleep. Bleh and Blah.
I feel so incredibly close to him...and pain stakingly far at the same time. I want to cry tears of happiness everytime I hear his voice, and tears of sadness the moment I have to get off the phone with him. I hate that I don't get to talk to him as much because of both of our busy and conflicting school and work schedules. I just want to cry right now because I want to call him for no reason at all just to tell him how much I love him and how special he is. I'm getting all teary eyed right now just THINKING about how much I miss him!
I've become a crying, emotional fool. I hope my baby doesn't mind :/
Sweetheart of course i dont mind, i got your message when i got home from lunch and checked my voice mail. the instant i heard your upset voice i sent out the thought to the universe that i belonged no where then in bed with you curled up next to me holding me close knowing i would never let you go.
I know this week and the following weeks until our schedules figure themselves out are gonna be rough but i want you to know just as much as you want me to know, that i love you. I love you no matter how frustrating the situation gets for me, no matter how sad i am that i dont get to see you or talk to you i know that soon i ll be talking to you, or soon i ll be seeing you. You are the light at the end of all of my dark tunnels.
Hmm i li ke that analogy. Because you truly are the light of my life. I can think of no way better to spend the rest of my life than with you, no matter how close or far if you are in it and we in love then i cant imagine it ever being too bad a life for me.
Veronica Irene Navor, i love you no matter which way life takes us up or down. I know i may be far but i am always close at heart, i am sorry i cannot be there with you in my arms when you want and need me to be. It tears me up that i cant, when you hurt i hurt...
I love you sweetheart with everything i can ever give you i love you veronica.
I love you sweetheart. Thank you for your reply.
I know the distance will take it's toll on me emotionally at times, but if there's one thing that will always bring me back up, it's knowing that I love you and you love me. Love is all we need, sweetheart. I know without a doubt in my mind that YOU are the love of my life, and you are all i'll ever need.
Thinking about being with you forever or even thinking that far ahead doesn't scare me, sweetheart....what scares me is the thought of NOT being with you forever.
I'd always felt a void that never bothered me before...that void of not having that person to love, and love me back. It never bothered me because I never found it or even seeked it out, so I didn't know what I missing. You, my love, are a godsend to MY life. You are everything I never knew I always wanted. You are the only person i've ever said I love you to, and the only person I ever want to say those words to, and hear those words from.
and on that note...
I Love You, Victor Javier Ochoa <3
G'nite my love.